We all have little habits and quirks that we don’t even realize we’re doing. And in public, these can sometimes be the subject of silent judgement.
It’s not about making you paranoid, it’s just that some actions can be seen as disrespectful or annoying to others, even if we don’t mean it that way.
In the spirit of self-improvement, I’ve compiled a list of 10 things you might be doing in public that people secretly judge you for.
Let’s get started.
1) Loud phone conversations
We’ve all been there. You’re in a public space, minding your own business, when suddenly you’re unwillingly drawn into someone else’s phone conversation.
It might seem harmless to you. After all, you don’t know anyone around you, right? What’s the harm in a quick, loud chat with your friend about last night’s date or the latest office gossip?
Well, here’s the thing – other people around you might not share your nonchalance. Public spaces are shared spaces and loud phone conversations can be seen as intrusive and disrespectful.
No one is saying you shouldn’t take calls in public. Just be aware of your surroundings and keep your voice down. After all, not everyone needs to know about that embarrassing thing your boss said in the meeting.
2) Not picking up after your pet
I have a dog, a sprightly little terrier named Daisy. We go for walks all the time, and Daisy, being a dog, does her business when nature calls.
One morning, I had forgotten to bring my usual stash of doggy bags. Daisy, of course, chose that exact moment to do her business on the sidewalk. Without my usual supplies, I was stuck. I looked around, panicked and embarrassed. No one was around, so I did what I thought was best – I left it there.
Later on, I bumped into my neighbor who mentioned the unwelcome ‘surprise’ she’d come across during her morning jog. I felt mortified! I had inconvenienced someone else because of my own forgetfulness.
That day, I learned a valuable lesson: Always be prepared and clean up after your pets in public spaces. It’s not just about keeping the area clean; it’s about showing respect to your fellow community members. If you don’t do this already, you might be receiving some silent judgement from your neighbors too.
3) Blocking the sidewalk
Sidewalks are designed for everyone to use, from pedestrians and runners to parents with strollers. But when you stop in the middle of the path or walk in a group that spans the entire width of the sidewalk, you’re essentially blocking the way for others.
In Japan, there’s a concept called “meiwaku” which represents an awareness of not causing inconvenience or annoyance to others. This includes not blocking sidewalks. It’s a cultural norm that extends far beyond Japan and is considered basic etiquette in many places around the world.
When you’re out and about, be mindful of how you’re using shared spaces like sidewalks. You don’t want to be that person who’s obliviously blocking the way and causing others to navigate around you.
4) Talking during a movie
Picture this: You’re in a cinema, the lights dim, and the movie starts. It’s a scene you’ve been waiting to see since you saw the trailer. And then, from the row behind you, someone starts a conversation. Annoying, isn’t it?
Talking during a movie is one of those public behaviors that most people find disrespectful. The cinema is a shared space where everyone has paid to enjoy the film, not to listen to your commentary or personal stories.
Your whispers can be louder than you think, especially in a quiet cinema hall. So save your thoughts for after the movie and let everyone around you enjoy the experience in peace.
5) Leaving your shopping cart in the parking lot
We’ve all seen it – a stray shopping cart, left abandoned in the middle of a parking lot. It’s a small act that can cause a big inconvenience.
Leaving your shopping cart anywhere but the designated areas can block parking spaces, obstruct traffic, and even potentially damage vehicles if it rolls away. Plus, it only takes a few extra seconds to return your cart to its rightful place.
When you’re done with your groceries, take a moment to return your cart. It’s a small act of courtesy that can make a big difference in maintaining order in public spaces.
6) Ignoring the homeless
We live in a society where homelessness is a harsh reality. It’s easy to fall into the habit of ignoring those less fortunate, especially when you’re rushing through your busy day.
But remember, everyone has a story. The person you pass on the street might have had a job, a family, a home just like you, before circumstances spiraled out of their control.
You don’t have to give money or food every time – sometimes, just acknowledging their presence with a smile or a kind word can make a big difference.
Ignoring the homeless is something people may judge you for. Showing empathy and kindness, on the other hand, is something that will always be appreciated.
7) Being engrossed in your phone
I remember attending my niece’s school play a few years back. She had the smallest role, but to me, it was the highlight of the event. I was so eager to capture her performance on my phone that I spent the entire play staring at a screen, ensuring I got the best shots.
When the play ended, I realized I had spent so much time trying to record the moment that I didn’t really experience it. The irony wasn’t lost on me – I had missed out on a special moment because I was too busy trying to preserve it.
Being engrossed in our phones, especially during social events or gatherings, can come off as rude or disinterested. It’s important to remember to live in the moment and not through a screen.
8) Over-apologizing
Saying sorry when you’ve done something wrong is polite and necessary. But have you caught yourself apologizing for things that aren’t your fault, like someone else bumping into you in a crowded place?
While it may seem like an act of politeness, frequent apologies can communicate a lack of confidence and make you appear smaller to others. It’s important to apologize when it’s warranted but be mindful not to undermine your own worth in the process.
So, next time you find yourself about to utter an unnecessary ‘sorry’, pause and consider if it’s really needed. You might just be doing it out of habit, and it could be a habit worth breaking.
9) Littering
Tossing that empty soda can onto the street or leaving your coffee cup on a park bench might seem like no big deal, but littering is a public behavior that is universally frowned upon.
Besides being illegal in many places, littering shows a disregard for our shared spaces and the environment. It’s an action that contributes to pollution, harms wildlife, and can negatively affect the quality of life in our communities.
Keeping our surroundings clean is a collective responsibility. So always take a moment to dispose of your trash properly. It might be a small action, but it’s one that can make a big difference in maintaining the cleanliness and beauty of our public spaces.
10) Not respecting personal space
Personal space is an invisible boundary that we all have around us. It’s something we instinctively protect, and when someone invades it without our permission, it can make us feel uncomfortable or even threatened.
Whether it’s standing too close in line at the grocery store or sitting right next to someone in an otherwise empty movie theater, not respecting personal space is a surefire way to earn silent judgement.
Everyone has a right to their own personal space. Respecting this boundary is a fundamental part of maintaining harmonious interactions in public spaces.
