Power dynamics in a relationship can be tricky to navigate, especially when they’re skewed. That’s when you start feeling, well, off balance. And no, it’s not something you’re imagining. Psychology has some insights about this.
Now, I don’t want to play the fear card here. It’s not about you constantly second-guessing your relationship. It’s about being aware of certain signs that indicate a power imbalance.
Why? Because recognizing these signs is the first step in addressing them. After all, your relationship is a two-way street and it should feel that way too.
Let’s get into it. Here are seven subtle signs there’s a power imbalance in your relationship, according to psychology.
1) You’re always the one compromising
There’s a thing about relationships; they’re supposed to be balanced. Equal give and take, right? But sometimes, that’s not the case.
And no, it’s not about who does the dishes more. It’s about the bigger decisions in your relationship. Decisions that shape your life together.
Consider this. Are you always the one adjusting your plans? Are your preferences often set aside for theirs? If you’re constantly compromising without seeing the same effort from your partner, psychology says this could be a sign of a power imbalance.
Remember, it’s not about keeping score. It’s about ensuring both parties have an equal say in the relationship.
If you feel like you’re bending over backwards more often than not, it might be time to address this imbalance.
2) You feel too comfortable
Now, this may seem counterintuitive. Isn’t comfort what we all aim for in a relationship?
Well, yes. But there’s a catch.
Comfort is great, but complacency isn’t. When you’re so comfortable that you stop questioning anything, stop advocating for your needs, or stop pursuing your personal growth, it signals an issue.
You see, a relationship should encourage individuality along with togetherness. It should inspire growth and not stagnation.
Now if you find yourself stuck in a comfort rut, not making any personal progress and even letting your partner make most of the decisions without question, it’s time to examine the power dynamics in play.
3) You’re constantly seeking their approval
Approval-seeking behavior can be a subtle sign of an imbalance in your relationship. It’s normal to want your partner’s approval, but it becomes a problem when you’re constantly striving to please them, even at the cost of your own happiness or well-being.
In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I talk about how this can lead to codependency.
When you find yourself regularly changing your opinions, concealing your true feelings, or compromising on things important to you just to get their approval, it’s time to pause and reassess.
A healthy relationship involves mutual respect and understanding, not one person continually bending to the other’s will.
4) You’re afraid to express disagreement
Healthy disagreement is a cornerstone of any strong relationship. It allows us to understand each other better, even if we don’t always see eye-to-eye.
But what happens when you find yourself holding back your true feelings and opinions just to avoid conflict?
As Eleanor Roosevelt once wisely said, “Do what you feel in your heart to be right – for you’ll be criticized anyway.” If you’re constantly censoring your thoughts and feelings out of fear of upsetting your partner, it could be a sign of a power imbalance.
Speaking from personal experience, it’s important to remember that your opinions matter just as much as your partner’s. And being able to express them freely is integral to maintaining a balanced relationship.
5) You feel unheard
Communication is a two-way street in any relationship. It’s not just about expressing your thoughts and feelings, but also about being listened to and understood.
I’ve been there before, where I felt like my voice was lost in the sea of my partner’s opinions.
And let me tell you, it’s not a good place to be. Feeling unheard can lead to resentment and frustration, subtly indicating a power imbalance in your relationship.
If you’re often left feeling like your opinions and feelings are disregarded or overlooked, it’s time to address this issue. Remember, your thoughts and emotions are just as valid and deserve to be heard and acknowledged.
6) You’re not in control of your own time
Your time is, essentially, your life. How you choose to spend it should be entirely up to you. But if you often find yourself arranging your schedule around your partner’s demands or preferences, there might be an imbalance.
I remember a time when my own calendar was filled with my partner’s priorities while my own were sidelined. It wasn’t healthy and it took a toll on me.
As the wise Benjamin Franklin once said, “Lost time is never found again.” It’s essential to have control over your own time in a relationship.
By the way, if you’d like to keep up with my latest articles, feel free to follow me on Facebook. I regularly share insights and advice that can help create healthier, happier relationships.
7) You’re losing yourself
This is the raw, uncomfortable truth. If you’re losing your identity, your sense of self, in your relationship, it’s a glaring sign of power imbalance.
We all change and grow in a relationship, yes. But that growth should be enriching, not diminishing. If you’re feeling like an extension of your partner rather than an individual in your own right, it’s time to reassess.
Are you giving up your hobbies? Are you distancing from your friends? Are you constantly putting their needs before yours?
These are tough questions, but necessary ones. Remember, a healthy relationship encourages you to be your best self, not lose yourself.
A final thought
Navigating the dynamics of relationships can often feel like trying to solve a complex puzzle. Understanding the signs of a power imbalance is a step towards creating healthier, more balanced connections.
I’d like to leave you with this thought – it’s okay to acknowledge when things aren’t quite right. It isn’t about laying blame, but about recognizing patterns that might be hindering the growth of your relationship.
Remember, it’s not just about identifying these signs but also taking steps to address them.
For those who’d like to delve deeper into these dynamics and understand them better, I recommend this insightful video by Justin Brown.
He discusses the complexities of finding a life partner, reflecting on his personal experiences and sharing invaluable lessons that can help you navigate your relationship journey.
Every relationship has its ups and downs. The key is to keep learning, growing and working towards a healthier balance.
