Let’s talk about manipulation – it’s a tricky game to play, especially when the manipulator starts to lose ground.
You see, manipulators are masters at getting what they want, often at the expense of others. But what happens when they feel they’re losing control?
Well, they don’t simply give up. Instead, they resort to certain tactics to try and regain their position of power.
In this piece, we’ll be uncovering these hidden strategies.
Let’s get started.
1) They play the victim
Manipulators are known for turning the tables when they start to lose control.
This is where the ‘victim card’ comes into play.
Suddenly, they’re not the ones manipulating anymore. Instead, they become the ‘victim’ of circumstances, or even worse, your actions.
They’ll use this as a strategy to regain control, making you feel guilty for standing up to them.
It’s a psychological trick that’s incredibly effective if you’re not aware of it.
But now that you know, you can stay one step ahead of their game. Remember, it’s not about who’s right or wrong. It’s about maintaining control over your own decisions and actions.
2) They start to gaslight
Let me tell you a little story about a situation I found myself in once.
I had a friend, let’s call him Mike. Mike was a master at manipulation, even though I didn’t realize it at first. When he started to lose the upper hand in our relationship, he resorted to gaslighting.
Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where the manipulator causes you to question your own sanity.
In my case, Mike started to twist my words and actions, making me doubt my own memory. He’d insist events didn’t happen the way I remembered them or he’d blame me for things I knew I hadn’t done.
I felt like I was losing my mind until I learned about gaslighting and realized what was happening.
Manipulators like Mike use gaslighting to make you second guess yourself and regain control. It’s one of their most devious tactics, but being aware of it can help you stand your ground.
No one has the right to make you doubt your own reality. Trust yourself, believe in your experiences and don’t let a manipulator take that away from you.
3) They resort to flattery
Flattery is a common tool in the manipulator’s arsenal. It can be disarmingly effective, especially when the manipulator senses they’re losing control.
The underlying psychology is fascinating. According to a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, we tend to believe compliments, even when we know they’re insincere, because they satisfy our need for approval.
Manipulators exploit this need to their advantage. By showering you with compliments, they’re hoping to distract you from their true intentions and regain the upper hand.
But remember, flattery is just a smokescreen. Don’t let it cloud your judgement or sway your decisions. Stand firm and keep your eyes on the manipulator’s actions, not their words.
4) They create a sense of urgency
When a manipulator senses they’re losing their grip, they often try to instill a sense of urgency in you.
The idea is to make you feel anxious, rushed, and under pressure. They want you to make quick decisions without taking the time to think things through or consult others.
It’s a clever tactic because it can make you second-guess your initial resistance to their manipulation. You might even start wondering if you’re the one being unreasonable for not going along with their requests immediately.
It’s okay to say, “I need to think about it.” Don’t let anyone rush you into decisions you’re not comfortable with.
5) They bring up past mistakes
I’ll admit, I’ve made mistakes in the past. We all have. But manipulators have a way of weaponizing these against us when they feel like they’re losing control.
I remember a time when I’d made an error at work, and a manipulative colleague used that one mistake to undermine my confidence for months afterward. It was their way of regaining the upper hand – by making me feel less competent, less confident, they hoped to make me more susceptible to their influence.
Everyone makes mistakes and it’s part of the human experience. Don’t let a manipulator use your past against you. Recognize the tactic for what it is – a desperate attempt to regain control.
6) They become overly defensive
Manipulators don’t like to lose. When they sense they’re losing the upper hand, they often react by becoming overly defensive.
Suddenly, every conversation turns into a battlefield. They’re quick to take offense and slow to listen. They’ll deflect criticism and shift blame, all in an effort to throw you off balance and regain control.
It’s a tough situation to navigate, but remember – you’re not responsible for their reactions. Keep your cool, stay firm in your stance, and don’t let their defensiveness derail the conversation or influence your decisions.
7) They threaten to withdraw
The final tactic manipulators often resort to when they’re losing the upper hand is threatening to withdraw.
This could mean threatening to end a relationship, withdraw support, or even cut off contact completely. It’s a scare tactic designed to make you feel insecure and fearful, thus making you more likely to give in to their demands.
Don’t let this intimidate you. It’s crucial to remember that you have the right to stand up for yourself and maintain your boundaries, even if that means letting the manipulator walk away. You deserve respect and fair treatment, and anyone unwilling to provide that might not be worth keeping in your life.
Parting thoughts: The power lies within
The world of manipulation can be a daunting one to navigate. The tactics and strategies manipulators employ when they sense a loss of control can be intimidating, jarring, and downright disorienting.
Yet, it’s paramount to remember a crucial truth: You hold the power.
Psychologist and author Dr. George K. Simon once said, “People who manipulate others are always trying to get something. Sometimes they’re after power, other times control or even adulation.”
But the key is, they can only gain these things if we give it to them. Manipulators may twist words, play the victim, resort to flattery or even threaten to withdraw. But ultimately, they can only succeed in their manipulation if we allow it.
So as you navigate interactions with potential manipulators, remember your inherent strength and autonomy. Recognize the tactics, stand firm in your convictions, and never lose sight of your worth.
After all, the power isn’t in the hands of the manipulator. It’s within you.
