If you’ve ever come across the term “alpha male,” you know it’s often associated with a certain type of masculinity – one that’s confident, dominant, and assertive.
Yet, some behaviors these self-proclaimed “alpha males” consider manly might not actually be so, at least not according to psychology.
Being an “alpha male” isn’t something you can measure or define universally, and many behaviors associated with this term can be misunderstood or misinterpreted.
In this article, we’re going to explore eight behaviors “alpha males” believe are masculine but, in reality, aren’t.
Let’s dive into the world of alpha male myths.
1) Dominating the conversation
“Alpha males” often believe that being the loudest and most heard in the room equates to masculinity.
They dominate conversations, voicing their opinions strongly, and often disregarding the views of others.
However, this isn’t a sign of true masculinity, according to psychology. In fact, it’s seen as a lack of emotional intelligence and empathy.
Real strength lies in active listening, understanding, and respecting others’ perspectives.
This need to dominate conversations can lead to strained relationships and create an unhealthy dynamic where others feel unheard or diminished.
Instead of seeing this as a power play, many psychologists see it as a sign of insecurity.
So, while “alpha males” might think they’re asserting dominance by controlling the conversation, they are actually exhibiting behavior that is not considered truly masculine or attractive by psychological standards.
2) Displaying physical aggression
“Alpha males” often equate physical aggression or displays of strength to masculinity.
This could be anything from getting into fights, to breaking things when angry, or even simply showing off their physical prowess.
Psychology, however, views this behavior differently. Rather than being a sign of masculinity, it’s often seen as a lack of emotional control and an inability to resolve conflicts in a mature, non-violent manner.
True masculinity isn’t about using physical strength to assert dominance or to intimidate others. Instead, it’s about using one’s strengths productively and respectfully.
It’s about demonstrating emotional resilience and the ability to navigate difficult situations peacefully.
Therefore, while “alpha males” may associate physical aggression with manliness, psychology does not support this notion.
3) Suppressing emotions
“Alpha males” often feel the need to hide their emotions, believing it’s a sign of weakness to show vulnerability.
They tend to put on a tough exterior, making it seem like nothing phases them.
However, this behavior does not align with true masculinity.
Studies have shown that emotional suppression can lead to increased stress, poorer mental health, and even physical health issues over time.
People who are confident in their masculinity understand that showing emotions is not a sign of weakness but a part of being human.
They’re aware that vulnerability can actually be a strength because it shows authenticity and courage.
4) Not asking for help
“Alpha males” often feel the need to solve all problems on their own, seeing it as a blow to their masculinity to ask for help.
They believe that they should be able to handle everything themselves and that needing assistance is a sign of weakness.
However, nobody has all the answers or capabilities. Needing help is a part of being human, and there’s no shame in reaching out to others when you’re in over your head.
True strength and confidence come from recognizing one’s limitations and knowing when it’s time to seek assistance.
It shows humility, self-awareness, and an understanding that it’s okay not to be perfect.
While “alpha males” may see asking for help as unmasculine, it’s actually a sign of maturity and wisdom.
5) Overworking
Many “alpha males” believe that constant work and being the last one to leave the office is a sign of their dedication and masculinity.
They often neglect other aspects of their lives, thinking that their worth is tied to their professional success.
Yet, work-life balance is crucial for mental health and overall well-being. It’s necessary to take time for relaxation, hobbies, relationships, and self-care.
Being overworked can lead to burnout, stress, and health problems.
True masculinity is about understanding the importance of balance. It’s about the ability to excel at work while also nurturing personal growth and relationships.
6) Always taking the lead
“Alpha males” often feel the need to always be in control, taking the lead in every situation, whether it’s planning a family vacation or deciding what to cook for dinner.
They see this as a sign of their strength and masculinity.
But I remember a friend who was always insistent on making all the decisions. It didn’t make him seem more masculine but rather gave off an impression of being rigid and inflexible.
True masculinity embraces sharing responsibilities and decision-making. It’s about trusting others’ abilities and understanding that everyone has valuable insights and ideas to contribute
7) Never admitting mistakes
“Alpha males” often struggle to admit they’re wrong, perceiving it as a dent in their masculine image. They would rather defend their actions or shift blame than own up to a mistake.
However, this lack of accountability doesn’t make them more masculine or admirable. Instead, it shows a lack of maturity and humility.
We all make mistakes – it’s a part of being human. True strength lies in owning up to your errors, learning from them, and making efforts to right your wrongs.
8) Avoiding self-care
“Alpha males” often neglect self-care, seeing it as something unnecessary or even feminine.
They might believe that they don’t need things like proper sleep, healthy food, or regular exercise to maintain their masculine image.
But the most important thing to remember is that self-care is not a luxury, it’s a necessity. It’s not about pampering yourself but about taking care of your physical and mental health.
True masculinity is about understanding that you can’t take care of others or be your best self if you’re not in good health.
Taking care of oneself shows respect for one’s body and mind, which is a fundamental aspect of being a strong, resilient individual.
Conclusion
In the end, real masculinity isn’t about displaying dominance or suppressing vulnerability—it’s about being authentic, respectful, and emotionally intelligent.
This article aimed to debunk some common misconceptions about what it means to be a so-called “alpha male”.
But ultimately, what matters most is how you choose to define your own masculinity.
True intelligence lies in recognizing these misconceptions and not letting societal stereotypes dictate your behavior.
It’s about being confident enough to express yourself authentically, no matter what anyone else thinks.
Here’s to embracing a healthier, more balanced idea of what it truly means to be masculine!
