Selfishness isn’t always as obvious as we might think. Sometimes, it can be subtly woven into our behavior without us even realizing it.
It’s important to understand that being selfish doesn’t just mean not sharing your toys in the playground. It can also translate into more covert actions that may go unnoticed, even by the person being selfish.
Often, deeply selfish individuals unknowingly display certain subtle behaviors. And if you’re observant, you can spot these signs.
In this article, I’ll uncover the 8 subtle behaviors that people who are deeply selfish often exhibit without even realizing it.
1) They’re often the center of their own universe
It’s not uncommon for deeply selfish people to exhibit a certain level of self-centeredness. However, it often goes beyond just taking care of their own needs and wants.
These individuals have a tendency to view the world from their perspective only. This means they focus primarily on their problems, their achievements, and their desires. Other people’s needs, feelings, or opinions are often disregarded or overlooked.
This self-centric behavior is a subtle manifestation of selfishness that can go unnoticed, especially if the person is charismatic or engaging. But over time, this pattern will reveal an underlying lack of empathy and a disregard for others.
Understanding this behavior can help us navigate relationships with such individuals and also serve as a self-check to ensure we aren’t unconsciously exhibiting this trait ourselves.
2) They have a hard time sharing
Sharing isn’t just about dividing the last piece of cake or lending your favorite book. It’s also about sharing time, attention, and emotional space.
As an example, I once had a friend who was excellent at captivating conversations with her exciting life stories. However, I started to notice a pattern. Whenever the conversation shifted away from her, she would either steer it back or lose interest.
This behavior extended to other areas as well. She was always reluctant to share her time or help others if it didn’t directly benefit her. This was a subtle sign of her deep-seated selfishness that I failed to recognize initially.
This experience taught me that selfishness isn’t just about physical possessions. It can also manifest as a reluctance to share emotional space, time, or even the spotlight. It’s these subtle behaviors that reveal a person’s true selfish nature without them even realizing it.
3) They often lack empathy
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s what allows us to connect on a deeper level. However, deeply selfish individuals often struggle with this.
Research from the University of California suggests that there’s a strong correlation between empathy and altruistic behavior. In other words, the more empathetic we are, the more likely we are to act selflessly.
In contrast, those who are deeply selfish may exhibit a lack of empathy. They might struggle to understand other people’s feelings or viewpoint, mainly because they’re so focused on their own. This can be a subtle sign of deep-seated selfishness that goes unnoticed until you really start to pay attention.
4) They rarely express genuine gratitude
Gratitude is about acknowledging the effort and kindness of others. It’s an expression of appreciation that strengthens our relationships and connections.
However, individuals who are deeply selfish often struggle with this. They might accept help, compliments, or gifts without genuinely acknowledging the effort or thought that went into it.
This behavior can be subtle, and many might dismiss it as a lack of manners or etiquette. But when observed consistently, it can be a revealing sign of a person’s underlying selfish nature.
A lack of genuine gratitude signifies a lack of appreciation for others — a trait often prevalent in deeply selfish individuals. Spotting this can provide insights into their character and help us navigate our interactions with them.
5) They struggle with genuine apologies
We all make mistakes. It’s part of being human. What sets us apart is our ability to acknowledge our errors, apologize sincerely, and learn from them.
However, deeply selfish individuals often struggle with this. They might avoid taking responsibility for their actions or deflect blame onto others. In some cases, their apologies might be more about appeasing others than expressing genuine remorse.
This can be heartbreaking to witness, especially in close relationships. It’s painful to see someone you care about unable to admit their mistakes and apologize sincerely.
6) They often fail to celebrate others
Celebrating the success of others is a beautiful way to show love and support. It’s about being genuinely happy for them and sharing in their joy.
However, I’ve noticed that deeply selfish individuals often struggle with this. When someone else achieves something significant, they might downplay it, change the subject, or even try to outdo it with their own achievements.
I remember when I landed my dream job after years of hard work, one person in my life just couldn’t seem to share in my excitement. Instead, they shifted the focus back to themselves or made light of my accomplishment. This behavior was subtle, but over time, it revealed a deep-seated selfishness.
7) They often exhibit a sense of entitlement
Entitlement is a belief that one inherently deserves privileges or special treatment. And while we all have moments where we feel entitled, it’s a different ball game when it becomes a pattern.
Deeply selfish individuals often exhibit a consistent sense of entitlement. They may believe they deserve special treatment, have unrealistic expectations from others, or show little regard for rules or norms.
This behavior can be subtle and sometimes masked by charm or charisma, making it easy to overlook initially. But in the long run, a persistent sense of entitlement can reveal deep-seated selfishness.
8) They often disregard the feelings of others
At the heart of selfishness is a lack of consideration for the feelings and needs of others. Deeply selfish individuals often disregard how their actions or words might affect those around them.
They may make decisions that benefit themselves without considering the impact on others, or dismiss or invalidate the feelings of others to suit their narrative.
This behavior is more than just being inconsiderate. It’s a clear indication of deep-seated selfishness. And understanding this can help us navigate relationships with such individuals more effectively.
