There’s a vast distinction between simply growing old and maturing, just as there is between just being smart and being truly wise.
Growing old is an inevitable course of life, but maturing involves developing a deep understanding of life. Similarly, being smart is about acquiring knowledge, while wisdom entails making the right decisions even in the most complex situations.
Wise and mature people have distinct behaviors that set them apart. And if you observe carefully, you can spot these behaviors in their everyday actions.
In this article, I’ll share with you the 9 telltale behaviors that indicate you’re interacting with a person of wisdom and maturity.
These signs will help you recognize not just an old or smart person, but someone who has truly grown in wisdom and maturity.
1) They listen more than they speak
One of the most striking traits of a wise and mature person is their ability to listen.
Often, in conversations, we’re so eager to get our own points across that we barely pay attention to what the other person is saying. But that’s not the case with someone who’s truly wise and mature.
A wise person knows that there’s always something new to learn, and they understand that every individual they meet has something valuable to share. They don’t just tolerate listening to others, they actually enjoy it.
They understand that listening is not just about being silent while the other person talks, it’s about truly understanding their thoughts and feelings.
If you ever come across someone who prefers to listen rather than dominate the conversation, you’re likely dealing with a wise and mature person.
2) They’re comfortable with “I don’t know”
Being wise doesn’t mean having an answer to everything. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. A wise and mature person is comfortable with not knowing everything.
I learned this lesson from a dear friend of mine, who I consider one of the wisest people I know. We were having a deep conversation about the mysteries of the universe when I asked him a particularly complex question. Instead of coming up with an elaborate theory or pretending to know the answer, he simply shrugged and said, “I don’t know, but isn’t it fascinating to think about?”
This was a profound moment for me. It made me realize that wisdom isn’t about knowing all the answers but about being comfortable with not knowing, staying curious, and constantly seeking knowledge.
3) They’re not driven by ego
A wise and mature person is not controlled by their ego. They don’t always need to be right, nor do they need constant recognition for their achievements.
In a study conducted at the University of Waterloo, researchers found that people with high levels of wisdom were less likely to have their self-esteem affected by external factors such as validation and approval from others. This demonstrates a strong correlation between wisdom and a well-controlled ego.
If you notice someone who is humble, who doesn’t let their pride get in the way of admitting mistakes or learning from others, you’re probably dealing with a wise and mature person. They understand that growth comes from acknowledging our shortcomings and continuously striving to improve.
4) They’re adaptable to change
Change is a constant in life, and how one deals with it can be a clear indicator of their maturity and wisdom.
Wise and mature people understand that change is inevitable. Instead of resisting it, they embrace it. They see change not as a threat but as an opportunity for growth and learning.
They have the ability to adapt to new situations and challenges with an open mind. They don’t cling to the past or fear the future, but rather take each moment as it comes and make the best out of it.
5) They value relationships
The way a person treats their relationships can reveal a lot about their level of maturity and wisdom.
Wise and mature people understand the value of good relationships. They don’t just maintain relationships for personal gain or convenience, but because they genuinely care about others.
They are willing to invest time and effort into nurturing their relationships. They are empathetic, understanding, and they treat others with respect and kindness.
6) They appreciate simplicity
In a world that often equates complexity with intelligence, wisdom finds beauty in simplicity. A wise and mature person understands that life doesn’t have to be complicated to be meaningful.
They appreciate the simple things in life – a good book, a peaceful walk, a heartfelt conversation, or a warm cup of tea. They know that these seemingly ordinary moments hold extraordinary joy and contentment.
Their wisdom allows them to strip away the unnecessary clutter and distractions, revealing the pure essence of life. They understand that true happiness lies not in possessions or status but in peace of mind and contentment.
7) They embrace failure
Failure can be daunting. It can hit hard and leave scars. But a wise and mature person knows that failure is not the end, but a stepping stone towards success.
A few years back, I experienced a major setback in my career. It was devastating and left me questioning my abilities. But during that time, I met a woman who taught me a valuable lesson. She said, “Failure isn’t falling down, it’s refusing to get back up.”
This changed my perspective. I realized that failure isn’t something to be feared or avoided, but something to be embraced. It’s through our failures that we learn the most valuable lessons and grow stronger.
8) They practice gratitude
Gratitude is a powerful practice that can significantly impact one’s perspective on life. Wise and mature individuals understand this and make gratitude a daily habit.
They don’t take things for granted. Instead, they appreciate what they have, even the small things. They understand that focusing on what’s good in their lives helps them maintain a positive outlook, even when things are tough.
They also express their gratitude to others, showing appreciation for their efforts and contributions. This not only strengthens their relationships but also contributes to their own happiness.
9) They live in the present
Perhaps the most profound sign of a wise and mature person is their ability to live in the present moment.
They understand that the past is gone and the future is yet to come. The only moment we truly have is now. While they learn from the past and plan for the future, they don’t let these thoughts consume them.
They are fully engaged in their current task or conversation. They’re not distracted by their phone or their thoughts; they are fully here, in this moment.
Living in the present allows them to fully experience life as it unfolds, embracing both its joys and challenges with an open heart and mind. It’s this ability to stay grounded in the present that truly distinguishes the wise from the simply smart.
Final thoughts: Wisdom is a journey
The ancient Greek philosopher, Socrates, once said, “The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.” This profound statement encapsulates the essence of true wisdom. It’s about embracing the unknown, staying curious, and continuously seeking knowledge.
The behaviors we’ve discussed are not a checklist to tick off but guiding principles to incorporate into our lives. They are indicators of a deeper understanding and acceptance of life in all its complexity.
As we journey through life, we must remember that wisdom doesn’t come with age but with experience and introspection. Wisdom is not about knowing all the answers but about questioning, learning, and evolving.