Remember when you were a kid and you’d run into a problem?
Maybe you couldn’t solve a puzzle, or you had a squabble with a playmate.
You’d turn to the nearest grown-up, hoping they’d have the magic solution—and sometimes, they did!
Those people in our lives who always seem to have sage advice at the ready, well, they didn’t just stumble upon their wisdom.
According to psychology, there are specific experiences people often go through in their formative years that shape them into the excellent advisors they become later in life.
So what are these experiences?
Let’s delve into the childhoods of those who possess this knack for doling out stellar advice.
In doing so, we might just learn a thing or two about how to better approach our own challenges and even help others with theirs:
1) They grew up in an environment that encouraged open communication
You know those families where no topic is off-limits? Where dinner time is filled with lively discussions and debates?
People who grow up in such environments often become great advice-givers later in life.
The reason? They learn early on how to express their thoughts clearly and respectfully, even when dealing with complicated or sensitive issues.
Now, this doesn’t mean they were always in agreement with everyone around the table. Quite the contrary, actually.
These interactions often involved differing viewpoints, disagreements, and even arguments.
But here’s the thing: these experiences taught them how to listen, understand different perspectives, and articulate their own views effectively—all crucial skills when it comes to giving advice.
So the next time you find yourself in a discussion (heated or otherwise), remember this: it’s not just about getting your point across.
It’s also about understanding where others are coming from. And who knows? You might just become the go-to advice giver in your circle!
2) They were often called upon to mediate disputes
Growing up, I was often the peacemaker among my siblings.
With five of us under one roof, arguments were as common as our daily meals.
There was the time when my younger brother took my sister’s favorite toy, causing a major uproar—and then there was the incident where my oldest brother ate the last piece of cake that was supposed to be for my other sister.
In situations like these, I found myself right in the middle, trying to resolve the issue and restore peace.
I would listen to each side, make sure everyone felt heard, and then help find a solution that everyone could agree with.
Little did I know, those early experiences were shaping me into the person I am today—someone who people often turn to for advice.
The ability to mediate disputes, understand different viewpoints, and find a middle ground—these are all qualities of a great advice-giver, and it’s these experiences during childhood that often help develop these skills.
Here’s the reality—life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows.
Even the most positive among us have had our fair share of stormy weather.
And you know what? That’s perfectly okay.
Growing up, I learned that the biggest lessons often come from our darkest times.
It was during these moments that I was forced to find my own strength, to dig deep and pull myself up, to look at each day as a new opportunity.
And let me tell you, it was tough.
It’s these hardships and challenges that often shape great advice-givers.
They’ve had to navigate through their own maze of troubles, which helps them understand what others might be going through.
That’s why when you turn to them in your time of need, you feel understood—you feel seen.
They don’t just hand out advice from an ivory tower; they offer guidance based on their own experiences.
4) They had role models who were great listeners
Think back to your childhood and the influential adults in your life. Was there someone who always had time for you, who listened to your worries and dreams without interruption or judgment?
Maybe it was a parent, a teacher, or a beloved aunt or uncle.
Whoever it was, their attentive listening likely made a big impact on you.
Great advice-givers often have this in common: they had role models who were excellent listeners.
These role models taught them, perhaps without even realizing it, the value of truly listening to another person.
They showed that advice isn’t just about providing solutions; it’s about understanding the problem from the other person’s perspective.
5) They were exposed to diverse experiences and cultures
Did you know that travel can actually make your brain more flexible?
It’s true!
Exposure to different cultures, languages, and experiences can stimulate cognitive flexibility, making your brain more adaptable.
People who give great advice often have diverse backgrounds or have been exposed to a broad range of experiences.
This exposure helps them see the world from multiple perspectives.
This isn’t just about physical travel though.
It could be as simple as growing up in a multicultural neighborhood, having friends from different backgrounds, or even reading widely about various cultures and societies.
The ability to understand different viewpoints is a crucial asset for anyone who wants to give good advice.
Because at the end of the day, good advice isn’t one-size-fits-all; it’s tailored to the individual, taking into account their unique circumstances, culture, and worldview.
6) They learned the importance of empathy at an early age
There’s a beautiful quote by Plato that goes, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”
This was a lesson I learned early on from my mother.
She always reminded me to step into other people’s shoes, to try and understand their feelings and experiences before making any judgments.
This lesson of empathy has stayed with me and shaped how I interact with others.
It enables me to offer advice that is not just practical, but also compassionate and understanding.
People who are great at giving advice often have this deep sense of empathy.
They understand that advice isn’t just about solving problems; it’s about acknowledging the emotional impact those problems have on the person.
7) They understood the value of learning from mistakes
Mistakes are not failures.
They are opportunities for growth, lessons in disguise.
The best advice-givers are those who have stumbled, fallen, and picked themselves up again.
They’ve tasted the bitterness of failure and the sweetness of overcoming obstacles.
They’ve learned that every misstep is a stepping stone towards success, a nugget of wisdom to be shared with others.
So, if you’re ever afraid of making mistakes, don’t be—embrace them, learn from them, and most importantly, share the lessons you’ve learned with others.
Because that’s what makes you not just a good advice-giver, but a great one.
Wrapping up
The beauty of life is that it’s never too late to learn and grow.
We all have the potential to become wiser, more empathetic, and better at giving advice.
Every conversation is an opportunity to listen, learn, and understand.
Each mistake and hardship, a chance to grow stronger and share our wisdom with others.
So next time someone comes to you seeking advice, remember this: You’re not just helping them navigate their problems; you’re sharing pieces of your own journey, your own lessons, your own growth.
In doing so, you not only make their lives a little better but also enrich your own, because when we give advice from a place of empathy and understanding, we build deeper connections and become better versions of ourselves.
So, keep growing, keep learning, and keep sharing your wisdom with the world.
That’s the real power of great advice!
