Being an INFJ, the world’s rarest personality type, is an experience that’s unique, to say the least.
As the founder of Hack Spirit and a mindfulness enthusiast, I’m Lachlan Brown, and I’ve always been fascinated by the complexities of human personality.
INFJ types, also known as “The Advocates”, are a rare breed, making up less than 1% of the population. They’re known for their ability to understand complex issues and their deep sense of empathy.
In this article, I’ll be sharing 11 signs that you might just belong to this exclusive club. These aren’t your everyday traits; they’re unique markers that set INFJs apart from the crowd.
So sit back as we delve into the world of ‘The Advocate’. It’s going to be a revealing journey.
1. You feel a deep sense of empathy
As an INFJ, one of the most notable traits you might possess is a profound sense of empathy. It’s not just about understanding someone else’s feelings; it’s about truly feeling what they feel.
This empathy isn’t limited to just the people you know. You could find yourself deeply affected by events in the news or by a movie scene. It’s as if you can connect with the emotions of others, regardless of distance or relationship.
This heightened sensitivity often leads INFJs to careers in counselling, psychology or any field where they can help others navigate their emotions and experiences.
But remember, while this empathy is a gift, it can also be emotionally draining. As Carl Jung, the founder of analytical psychology and the creator of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) once said, “Empathy has no script. There is no right way or wrong way to do it. It’s simply listening, holding space, withholding judgment, emotionally connecting, and communicating that incredibly healing message of ‘You’re not alone.’”
2. You’re an introvert, but people think you’re an extrovert
As an INFJ myself, I’ve always been a bit of a paradox when it comes to social interactions.
On one hand, I need my alone time to recharge. Too much social interaction can leave me feeling drained and longing for the peace and quiet of my own space. That’s the introvert in me.
However, when I am in social situations, I’m good at it. I can strike up a conversation with ease, and people often mistake me for an extrovert. This is because INFJs are great at understanding and connecting with people on a deep level.
I remember one instance at a networking event. I was chatting with various people, making connections, and by the end of the evening, someone remarked how outgoing I was. Little did they know that as soon as I got home, all I wanted was to curl up with a good book and enjoy my solitude.
So if you find yourself often stuck between wanting your alone time but also enjoying meaningful interactions, you might just be an INFJ.
3. You’re driven by a sense of purpose
As an INFJ, you won’t find satisfaction in mundane tasks or a 9-to-5 job that doesn’t speak to your soul. You desire a career and a life that align with your values, and that allows you to make a real impact in the world.
You’re not motivated by money or status, but by purpose. You need to feel that what you’re doing is meaningful and contributes to the greater good.
In my book “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego”, I delve deeper into this concept. It’s about understanding how our actions can have a profound effect on the world around us, and how living with purpose can bring us immense satisfaction and peace.
If you’re constantly seeking purpose and meaning in your life, and feel dissatisfied when you can’t find it, this could be a sign that you’re an INFJ. Your quest for meaning isn’t a weakness, it’s one of the greatest strengths of your personality type. So embrace it, and continue striving towards making a positive impact in the world.
4. You tend to forecast the future
One of the key psychological traits of an INFJ is their ability to think about the future. INFJs are known for their “N” trait, which stands for intuition in the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). This means they’re forward thinkers and often spend a lot of time contemplating the future.
While some people might be more focused on the present or past, as an INFJ, you likely have a knack for predicting outcomes and seeing potential. You might find yourself planning ahead and forecasting future scenarios in your head.
This trait is a double-edged sword. On one hand, it helps you prepare for anything that life might throw at you. On the other hand, it can often lead to unnecessary worry or anxiety about things that have not happened yet.
According to psychology, this foresight is part of your intuitive function. It’s like having a built-in crystal ball that helps you navigate life with an eye towards the future. So if you often find yourself contemplating what’s next, this could be another sign that you’re an INFJ.
5. You crave alone time, yet you feel lonely
This might seem counter-intuitive, but as an INFJ, it’s a common paradox you might find yourself in. INFJs are introverts at heart, meaning they recharge their energy by spending time alone. Yet, at the same time, they can often feel a deep sense of loneliness.
This could be because while INFJs enjoy their solitude, they also crave deep, meaningful connections with others. They’re not interested in small talk or surface-level interactions. They long for conversations that are profound and significant.
So when they’re alone, they enjoy it. They relish the peace and quiet that solitude brings. But when that solitude becomes prolonged or when their interactions with others lack depth and substance, they can start to feel lonely.
It’s a delicate balance to maintain – needing time alone to recharge but also longing for deep connections. If you find yourself in this paradoxical situation, it’s another sign that you might be an INFJ.
6. You’re highly sensitive to conflict
INFJs are peace-loving individuals. They abhor conflict and will often go to great lengths to avoid it. The idea of engaging in a heated argument or dealing with tense situations can be extremely uncomfortable for them.
That’s not to say INFJs are pushovers. They stand firm on their beliefs and values, but they prefer resolving issues in a calm and peaceful manner. They believe that harmony is essential for any relationship to thrive.
This sensitivity to conflict can sometimes make life challenging for an INFJ. You might find yourself avoiding confrontations at all costs, even when it’s necessary to stand up for yourself or others.
As renowned psychologist Dr. Elaine Aron, who has extensively studied high sensitivity, said, “Highly sensitive individuals are those who get more easily overwhelmed than others by stimuli like loud noises, large crowds, or long periods of time without rest.” If you find yourself nodding along to this, it might be another sign that you’re an INFJ.
7. You often feel misunderstood
Sometimes, it can feel like you’re speaking a different language from the rest of the world. You might find that people often misunderstand your intentions or misinterpret your actions. This is because INFJs are complex individuals with a unique way of seeing the world.
INFJs are deep thinkers and feelers, and this can sometimes lead to communication gaps with others who might not share the same level of depth or emotional intensity. It’s like trying to describe a color someone has never seen before.
This feeling of being misunderstood can be isolating at times. It’s like being in a crowded room, yet feeling utterly alone. But remember, it’s not a reflection of your worth or capability. It’s simply a byproduct of being one of the rarest personality types in the world.
So if you often feel misunderstood, take heart. It’s just another sign that you’re an INFJ.
8. You’re a perfectionist
As an INFJ, you might find that you’re never fully satisfied with anything less than perfection. Whether it’s a work project, a personal hobby, or even your own self-improvement, you have high standards and you strive to meet them.
Perfectionism, however, isn’t always about being the best. For an INFJ, it’s more about achieving their personal best. You’re not competing with others, but with yourself. You constantly want to improve, to grow, and to become the best version of yourself.
While this trait can drive you to achieve great things, it can also lead to unnecessary stress and self-criticism. It’s important to remember that nobody is perfect, and it’s okay to make mistakes.
In fact, it’s through mistakes that we learn and grow the most. So if you’re a perfectionist who is always looking for ways to improve, it’s another sign that you’re an INFJ.
Closing thoughts: Embrace your uniqueness
Being an INFJ can feel like a balancing act, navigating the world with a mix of deep empathy, intuition, and a yearning for solitude. You are a rare breed, a blend of characteristics that make you uniquely you.
It’s important to understand that being an INFJ is not just about identifying with certain traits. It’s about acknowledging how these traits shape your experiences, your relationships, and your understanding of the world around you.
In my book “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego”, I discuss the importance of self-awareness and acceptance. Embracing who you are, including your INFJ personality, is a crucial step towards living a life that’s authentic and fulfilling.
Being an INFJ means you see the world differently. You have a depth of understanding and empathy that many people never experience. Yes, it can be challenging at times. But remember, it’s also what makes you special.
So if you’ve found yourself in these signs, take heart. Your INFJ personality is not just a label – it’s a testament to your unique perspective and your rare approach to life. Embrace it, celebrate it, and use it to make your mark in the world.
