Aging gracefully isn’t just about looking good, it’s about feeling good too.
But let’s face it, some behaviors we’ve picked up along the way can be real happiness killers.
Just as we tidy up our homes periodically, we need to declutter our emotional baggage, too. Today we dive into 7 behaviors to bid adieu to, if you want to be happier and more optimistic as you get older.
Are you ready to sweep out the old and usher in a happier, more optimistic you?
Let’s get started.
1) Playing the comparison game
How many times have you found yourself scrolling through social media, noticing someone else’s “perfect” life, and feeling a pang of envy?
We’ve all been there.
But let’s be real: social media is a highlight reel, not reality. What we see is a curated collection of someone else’s best moments, a virtual magazine cover version of their life.
Comparing our every day to someone else’s edited moments can sap joy and optimism from our lives in no time.
As psychologist Dr Jordan Peterson wisely suggests in his bestselling book 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos, “Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.” This approach keeps the focus on our personal growth rather than an ever-shifting target based on others’ achievements.
By shifting our focus inward and measuring ourselves against our past, we can cultivate a sense of progress, resilience, and self-compassion—a recipe for true optimism.
2) Dwelling on the past
I’ll be honest. I used to be a chronic dweller. I’d spend hours ruminating over past mistakes, missed opportunities, and what-ifs.
Here’s what I’ve learned: dwelling on the past is like driving while looking in the rearview mirror. It’s simply not productive.
One day, I decided to stop this counterproductive behavior. Instead of obsessing over my past, I chose to learn from it. I accepted that I couldn’t change what had happened, but I could control how it influenced my future.
This shift in perspective was liberating. The past no longer held me hostage, and my outlook on life became more optimistic.
If you’re like how I was, stuck in the past, it’s time to break free. Learn from your experiences but don’t let them define you. Your past is just a story. And it’s time you start a new chapter.
3) Neglecting exercise
While we all know about the physical benefits of regular exercise, the mental rewards are just as powerful.
As the folks at Healthline have noted exercise can improve everything from mental clarity to overall happiness, making it a powerful tool for aging optimistically.
Exercise hasn’t yet found a consistent place in your routine? It’s time to rethink this.
This doesn’t mean you need to hit the gym every day. Even simple habits like morning stretches, a daily walk, or a few minutes of yoga can bring significant benefits.
When you prioritize movement, you’re not just investing in a stronger body but a happier, more optimistic mind.
4) Avoiding new experiences
As we get older, it’s so easy to get stuck in our ways and routines. But this can often lead to boredom and a sense of stagnation.
Embracing new experiences keeps life exciting and enriches us in countless ways. It opens up new perspectives, boosts our confidence, and often leads to unexpected joys.
Whether it’s trying a new cuisine, learning a new hobby, or traveling to a place you’ve never been before, each new experience brings with it a chance for growth and self-discovery.
So step out of your comfort zone. Embrace the unknown. Welcome the thrill of discovery and the optimism that comes with it.
5) Holding onto grudges
This is a big one.
We’ve all been hurt and wronged at some point in our lives. It’s a part of being human. However, holding onto those grudges and letting past wrongs dictate our present can rob us of our happiness.
Forgiveness isn’t about letting the other person off the hook. It’s about freeing ourselves from the chains of bitterness and resentment. It’s about choosing peace over conflict, love over hatred.
Research backs this up. A study of more than four thousand people showed that forgiving can lead to better well-being.
Life is too short to spend it nursing old wounds. Letting go of grudges doesn’t mean you forget what happened, but it means you stop letting it control your life.
6) Being overly self-critical
Here’s one I am sure many of you can relate to.
I used to be my own worst critic. Every mistake, every flaw, every failure – I’d magnify it until it overshadowed all my accomplishments.
Then one day, I realized that I wouldn’t speak to a friend the way I spoke to myself. Why was I so harsh on myself when I could be kind and understanding?
I started practicing self-compassion. I acknowledged my flaws and mistakes, but also recognized that they didn’t define me. I learned to be kinder to myself, to treat myself with the same compassion and understanding I’d give a friend.
It was a game-changer. My mood improved, my confidence grew, and my outlook on life became more positive.
If you’re stuck in a cycle of self-criticism like I was, trust me, it’s time for a change.
7) Overloading your schedule
In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to fall into the trap of being constantly busy. We fill our schedules to the brim, leaving no room for relaxation or self-reflection.
However, being constantly on the go can take a toll on our mental and physical health, leading to stress and burnout.
It’s essential to strike a balance between productivity and rest. Taking time to relax, rejuvenate, and engage in activities we enjoy is as important as getting work done.
Final reflection: The power of choice
As we age, we gain not only years but also wisdom. With this wisdom comes the understanding that happiness doesn’t just happen to us. It’s a choice we make every day.
So as you reflect on these behaviors, remember that it’s never too late to cultivate happiness and optimism in your life.
The choice is yours. Choose wisely. Choose happiness.
