Ever wonder why some men struggle to earn the respect they deserve at work, no matter how hard they try?
It’s frustrating—putting in the effort, doing the work, and yet somehow still feeling overlooked or underestimated by colleagues.
Often, the reasons aren’t as obvious as they seem. In fact, many guys unknowingly slip into habits that can subtly undermine their credibility, even if they have the best intentions.
The truth is, that workplace respect often hinges on perception as much as performance. There are certain behaviors that can make even the most capable men seem less confident or reliable, signaling to others that they aren’t to be taken seriously.
If you’re curious about what these habits might be, read on. You might be surprised to find a few you didn’t even realize you had—and a few that are holding you back from gaining the respect and authority you deserve.
1) Constant joking
Humor is as spontaneous as it comes.
It’s unpredictable, often without any clear-cut trigger, and once a joke is out there, there’s no taking it back. You either laugh it off or shrug it off.
However, men who are never taken seriously at work often have a penchant for constant joking, doubling their struggle for respect.
But this isn’t always a laughing matter. In fact, it’s because of this unchecked humorous streak that their work colleagues find it hard to take them seriously.
They notice when the mood shifts from serious to casual, when the meeting room’s atmosphere changes from focused to laid-back, and when these men use humor as a shield to hide their professional inadequacies.
If you’re one of these constant jokers, your humor might be the very thing undermining your credibility.
Not so funny now, is it?
2) Procrastination
Procrastination is a beast I’ve had to wrestle with plenty of times.
It comes knocking usually when deadlines are looming, and once it takes hold, shaking it off can be a herculean task. You either give in to it or muster the strength to fight it off.
In my early days at work, I used to be a habitual procrastinator. I would put tasks off until the very last minute, doubling my stress levels.
This wasn’t just harmful for me, it also negatively impacted how my colleagues perceived me. Because of my constant tardiness in delivering work, they found it hard to rely on me for important projects.
They could tell when I was dragging my feet on tasks, when I was avoiding responsibility, and when I’d use creative excuses to buy more time.
If you’re also a procrastinator like I was, your colleagues might be finding it hard to take you seriously.
It’s a tough pill to swallow, but acknowledging it is the first step towards change.
3) Lack of assertiveness
Assertiveness, or the lack thereof, can make a world of difference in how you’re perceived at work.
It’s a vital trait that signifies confidence and conviction, and its absence can create an impression of indecisiveness or even weakness.
And make no mistake, this can really affect people’s perception of you. Those who lack assertiveness often find themselves on the sidelines.
Their opinions are overlooked, their contributions undervalued, and they’re rarely entrusted with key responsibilities.
So it’s time to speak up and change that perception. Assertiveness makes people sit up and notice that you’re fully invested in the work!
As psychotherapist Moshe Ratson writes in Psychology Today, “Being assertive about what you want affirms your right to want what you want—even if there’s little chance of getting it. Assertiveness builds and maintains boundaries, resiliency, and confidence. It is the golden path of full engagement.”
4) Oversharing personal life
Being open about your personal life at work can be a slippery slope.
While it’s certainly important to be authentic and relatable, oversharing can quickly cross the line into unprofessional territory.
Those who tend to overshare personal details often find themselves in awkward situations. Their colleagues might feel uncomfortable or even irritated, and worse, they might start questioning their professionalism.
This can lead to them being seen less as a respected colleague and more as a source of office gossip or even entertainment.
Balancing personal and professional boundaries can be tricky, but it’s a crucial step towards being taken seriously at work.
5) Neglecting body language
Body language is a language I’ve learned to pay close attention to.
It’s subtle, and often overlooked, but it speaks volumes. From the way I stand to how I maintain eye contact, each gesture sends a message.
Earlier in my career, I didn’t pay much attention to my body language. I’d slouch during meetings, avoid eye contact, and even fidget when I was nervous. Little did I realize how these habits were affecting how I was perceived by my colleagues.
When I finally recognized this, I made a conscious effort to correct these habits. I started standing straighter, maintaining eye contact during conversations, and controlling nervous ticks.
If you’re like how I used to be — unaware of your body language — this might be why your colleagues aren’t taking you seriously.
The good news? Fixing it is easier than you’d think. With a bit of mindfulness, you can start being more aware of how you carry yourself, speak, and respond physically, transforming the message you send with every gesture.
6) Always agreeing
You’d think being agreeable would make you well-liked at work, right?
Well, it turns out that always agreeing isn’t necessarily a good thing. It might make you seem easygoing at first, but over time, it can lead to colleagues perceiving you as someone without a backbone.
Those who constantly agree, even when they don’t actually agree, are often seen as people who lack original ideas or the courage to voice their own opinions.
Colleagues might start to dismiss your contributions, thinking you’re just going along with the crowd rather than bringing something new to the table.
So stop being overly agreeable for the sake of harmony. It’s a tricky balance to strike, but learning to respectfully disagree can be a game changer in how you’re perceived at work.
7) Avoiding responsibility
Taking responsibility is a fundamental aspect of being a respected professional.
Those who shy away from responsibilities often find themselves left out of important tasks and discussions. Their colleagues may perceive them as unreliable or even incompetent.
On the contrary, those who embrace responsibility, even when things go wrong, are often seen as dependable and trustworthy.
Avoiding responsibility not only limits your opportunities for growth but can also damage your reputation among your colleagues.
8) Failing to listen
Listening is perhaps the most important skill when it comes to earning respect at work.
Those who don’t listen or constantly interrupt others often find themselves isolated. Their colleagues may see them as disrespectful or even arrogant.
In contrast, good listeners are often highly valued in the workplace. They’re seen as considerate, thoughtful, and reliable team players.
Remember, listening is more than just hearing – it’s about understanding and valuing others’ ideas and perspectives.
Final thoughts
Hopefully, if you’ve journeyed with us this far, you’ll realize that gaining respect at work is less about trying to impress and more about being genuine.
Because gaining respect has little to do with boasting about your achievements. Instead, it stems from understanding your own strengths and weaknesses and valuing the contributions of others.
If someone embodies this, they’re not just seen as a respectable colleague. They’re likely a great teammate to work with.
Being taken seriously at work isn’t about changing who you are, but refining how you present yourself. It’s about listening, respecting boundaries, asserting yourself, being responsible, and above all, staying true to yourself.
So take action today to address these habits and become the respected professional you aspire to be.
