We all like to believe that people mean what they say, especially when they come across as kind and genuine.
But sometimes, words are just a mask.
Some women have a way of saying things that seem warm and caring on the surface—but if you pay attention, you’ll notice something feels… off.
Whether it’s subtle manipulation, hidden judgment, or just insincerity, these phrases can reveal more than they intend to.
If a woman frequently uses these seven phrases in conversation, she might not be as kind or genuine as she wants you to think:
1) “No offense, but…”
If someone starts a sentence with “No offense, but…”, brace yourself—because what follows is usually offensive.
This phrase is often used as a way to soften an insult or a harsh opinion, but in reality, it just signals that the speaker knows they’re about to say something rude.
Instead of owning their words, they try to dodge responsibility by pretending they don’t mean any harm.
A truly kind and genuine person doesn’t need to preface their thoughts this way.
They know how to express themselves honestly without being disrespectful.
If a woman uses this phrase often, she might not be as considerate as she seems.
2) “I’m just being honest…”
I once had a coworker who loved to say “I’m just being honest” whenever she gave feedback.
At first, I appreciated her straightforwardness—until I realized that her “honesty” was just an excuse to be blunt and sometimes even cruel.
One time, I shared an idea in a meeting, and she immediately shot it down with, “That’s not going to work at all. I’m just being honest.”
No constructive feedback, no alternative suggestions—just a harsh dismissal wrapped in the guise of honesty.
Here’s the thing: Honesty without kindness isn’t honesty—it’s just rudeness.
A genuinely kind person doesn’t use honesty as a weapon; they use it to uplift and support others.
3) “I hate drama, but…”
People who claim to “hate drama” often seem to be the ones stirring it up the most.
This phrase is usually followed by gossip, criticism, or a story that conveniently places the speaker as the innocent victim of someone else’s actions.
Ironically, studies have shown that gossip makes up about 65% of our daily conversations.
While not all gossip is negative, those who constantly insist they “hate drama” while indulging in it are often trying to distance themselves from the very behavior they participate in.
A person who is truly kind and genuine doesn’t need to announce their dislike for drama—they simply don’t engage in it.
If a woman frequently uses this phrase before diving into gossip or conflict, she might not be as sincere as she seems.
4) “I’m not the kind of person who…”
Whenever someone says, “I’m not the kind of person who [does something bad],” it’s usually a sign that they’re about to do exactly that.
For example, “I’m not the kind of person who talks behind people’s backs, but…” almost always leads to gossip.
Or “I’m not the kind of person who holds grudges, but…” is often followed by a long list of past wrongs they haven’t let go of.
Rather than letting their actions speak for themselves, people who use this phrase are trying to convince you of something that might not actually be true.
A genuinely kind person doesn’t need to declare what they aren’t—they just show you through their behavior.
5) “I always try to be nice, but…”
For a long time, I thought being “nice” meant avoiding conflict, keeping the peace, and never upsetting anyone.
Whenever I had to say something even slightly uncomfortable, I’d soften the blow with, “I always try to be nice, but…” as if that somehow excused what came next.
The truth is: Kindness is about being honest while still being considerate.
People who constantly remind you of how nice they are often use it as a way to justify passive-aggressive comments or subtle digs.
A truly kind person doesn’t need to announce their niceness before saying something critical.
They speak with honesty and care—without needing a disclaimer.
6) “I don’t mean to be rude, but…”
Much like “No offense, but…”, this phrase is a warning sign that something rude is about to follow.
Instead of taking the time to phrase their thoughts in a more considerate way, the speaker uses this as a free pass to say whatever they want—without accountability.
If someone truly doesn’t mean to be rude, they wouldn’t feel the need to point it out.
A genuinely kind person knows how to communicate honestly without being dismissive or insulting.
If a woman frequently starts sentences with this phrase, chances are she knows exactly what she’s doing—and it’s not as kind or well-intentioned as she wants you to believe.
7) “I’m just saying…”
This phrase is often tacked onto the end of a statement to downplay its impact, as if it somehow makes a rude or unnecessary comment more acceptable.
“That outfit isn’t the most flattering… I’m just saying.” or “You always take things too personally… I’m just saying.”
It’s a way to deflect responsibility—turning the problem back onto the listener instead of owning the words that were said.
However, adding “I’m just saying” doesn’t make a statement any less hurtful or passive-aggressive.
A truly kind and genuine person stands by what they say without needing to soften it with an excuse.
Words reveal more than we think
The way people speak often gives away more than they realize.
Language isn’t just a tool for communication—it’s a reflection of thought patterns, intentions, and even character.
Subtle linguistic choices can reveal personality traits as the words people use in everyday conversation can indicate levels of honesty, emotional stability, and even narcissism.
Phrases like the ones we’ve discussed aren’t always harmless fillers; they can be small cracks in a carefully curated persona.
They hint at deeper tendencies—whether it’s passive-aggressiveness, avoidance of responsibility, or even manipulation.
Pay attention to the words people choose—they might be telling you more than they intend to.
