Have you ever felt like self-doubt is holding you back from living the life you truly want?
Maybe you’ve hesitated to chase a dream, speak up, or take a leap, all because that little voice in your head keeps saying, “What if I’m not good enough?”
You’re not alone—self-doubt has a way of creeping in and convincing us to play small.
The good news is, it doesn’t have to stay that way.
Letting go of self-doubt and building self-belief isn’t about flipping a switch—it’s about recognizing the habits that feed your insecurities and learning to replace them with more empowering ones.
If you’re ready to quiet that inner critic and step into your full potential, it’s time to say goodbye to these eight behaviors.
Let’s get started.
1) Constant self-comparison
We all have a natural tendency to compare ourselves to others, it’s part of being human.
But when you’re constantly comparing yourself to those around you, it can quickly lead to an unhealthy cycle of self-doubt.
Let me explain. When we constantly compare ourselves, we’re often looking at the best parts of others and stacking them up against our worst parts.
This skewed comparison is bound to leave us feeling inadequate.
What’s more, when you’re caught in this cycle, it’s hard to appreciate your own unique qualities or achievements because you’re too busy looking at what others have or do.
So if you want to let go of self-doubt, one of the first behaviors you need to say goodbye to is this constant self-comparison.
Try focusing more on your own journey, your own progress, and remember that everyone has their own unique path in life.
2) Seeking validation from others
Next on the list is a behavior I’ve personally struggled with: constantly seeking validation from others.
I remember there was a time when I used to measure my self-worth by how others perceived me.
If they praised me, I felt good about myself. But if they criticized me, I’d plunge into self-doubt.
This over-reliance on external validation is a dangerous trap.
It hands over control of your self-esteem to others and leaves you vulnerable to their opinions and judgments.
When I realized this, I made a conscious effort to detach my self-worth from the perceptions of others.
Instead, I started validating myself, acknowledging my achievements, and embracing my strengths and weaknesses.
And guess what? It made an enormous difference.
So if you’re stuck in the cycle of seeking external validation, it’s a behavior worth saying goodbye to.
Trust in your own worth and abilities.
3) Fostering a negative self-image
Fostering a negative self-image is another behavior that fuels self-doubt.
When you repeatedly tell yourself that you’re not good enough, incapable, or unlovable, it can be incredibly damaging to your self-belief.
We often underestimate the power of our thoughts and words.
But the thing is, they have the power to shape our reality.
Negative self-talk can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, where you start to believe these negative perceptions about yourself and they begin to manifest in your behavior and actions.
In my book, “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego”, I talk about the power of positive affirmations and how they can help reshape your self-image and boost your self-belief.
You might be surprised at how much of an impact positive affirmations can make on your overall mindset.
4) Fear of making mistakes
Psychology tells us that fear of making mistakes is a significant contributor to self-doubt.
This fear often stems from a perfectionist mindset, where anything less than perfect is unacceptable.
But here’s the thing: mistakes are a natural part of life.
They’re how we learn, grow, and develop.
When we fear making them, we hold ourselves back from exploring new opportunities, taking risks and ultimately, from our potential growth.
A study published in the Journal of Experimental Psychology found that those who see mistakes as learning opportunities have higher levels of performance over time compared to those who fear making mistakes.
So if you want to boost your self-confidence, it’s time to change your perspective on mistakes.
See them not as failures, but as stepping stones to success.
Remember what renowned psychologist Carol Dweck said about adopting a growth mindset: “No matter what your ability is, effort is what ignites that ability and turns it into accomplishment.”
5) Avoiding discomfort
This might sound counter-intuitive, but avoiding discomfort is actually a behavior that fuels self-doubt.
Why? Because growth often happens outside our comfort zones.
When we constantly seek comfort and avoid challenging situations, we limit our opportunities to learn, grow, and build resilience.
This can lead to a stagnant state where self-doubt flourishes.
On the other hand, when we lean into discomfort and take on challenges head-on, we prove to ourselves that we’re capable and strong.
This helps build self-confidence and belief in our abilities.
So while it might feel uncomfortable at first, start embracing challenges and stepping out of your comfort zone.
As famed psychologist Abraham Maslow said: “In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety.”
Choose growth, always, even if it means being a little uncomfortable.
6) Ignoring your achievements
How often do you brush off your successes like they don’t really matter?
Maybe you tell yourself it wasn’t a big deal, or you got lucky, or anyone could have done it.
This habit of ignoring or downplaying your achievements is like handing self-doubt a megaphone—it reinforces the idea that you’re not good enough, even when the evidence says otherwise.
Celebrating your wins, no matter how small, isn’t about being boastful—it’s about giving yourself credit where it’s due.
Your achievements are proof of your hard work, skills, and perseverance.
So the next time you accomplish something, take a moment to acknowledge it.
Write it down, share it with someone you trust, or just let yourself feel proud.
When you make a habit of recognizing your successes, you start to build a stronger foundation of self-belief—and that’s how you quiet self-doubt for good.
7) Not setting personal boundaries
Psychologists love reminding us to set and protect our personal boundaries.
Why? Because it’s so crucial to maintaining a healthy self-image and self-belief.
Without clear boundaries, it’s easy to be swayed by the opinions and expectations of others, leading to a loss of self-identity and self-doubt.
Boundaries help you define who you are and what you stand for, giving you a sense of control and self-respect.
They also protect your emotional and mental health from being drained by the demands of others.
8) Overthinking
The last behavior to bid farewell to is overthinking.
Getting trapped in a cycle of excessive thinking can lead to self-doubt, anxiety, and indecision.
Instead of leading to productive action, overthinking often results in endless loops of negative thoughts and worst-case scenarios.
This can cloud your judgement and distort your perception of reality, leading to increased self-doubt.
Practicing mindfulness techniques, such as meditation or deep-breathing exercises, can help quiet the mind and break the cycle of overthinking.
Remember, it’s not about eliminating all thoughts, but learning to manage them effectively.
Final thoughts
Self-doubt can feel like a guest that overstays its welcome, but it doesn’t have to control your life.
Letting go of the behaviors that fuel it can help you break free from its grip.
Believing in yourself doesn’t mean you’ll never have doubts again; it means learning to move forward despite them.
Take small, intentional steps to shift your mindset, celebrate your progress, and remind yourself of your worth.
Over time, these changes will quiet that inner critic and make room for a stronger, more confident version of you. You’ve got this.
