If you’ve spent time around someone with strong narcissistic tendencies, you might know the challenges this can bring.
The person may come across as self-centered, demanding, or lacking empathy. But over time, you may notice some changes. Perhaps they become less narcissistic as they age, adopting new behaviors that surprise you.
Narcissism isn’t a choice, it’s a recognized personality disorder. And like all personality traits, it can evolve over time.
Being around someone who is transitioning from high levels of narcissism can be a unique journey. Understanding what this process looks like can help navigate these changes.
Let’s delve into these key shifts.
1) Increased empathy
As individuals age, they often begin to see the world from a broader perspective. This can lead to a shift in their narcissistic tendencies, with an increased focus on empathy being a key change.
Narcissists typically struggle with understanding or considering other’s feelings. But when they begin to show more empathy, it’s a sign of reduced narcissism. For example, instead of putting their own needs first all the time, they start to consider the needs of others.
This change doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a gradual process that requires patience and understanding from those around them. But it’s a positive shift that can lead to healthier relationships.
If you notice someone who used to be narcissistic starting to genuinely care about how their actions affect others, this is a big step forward. They may still stumble at times – after all, old habits die hard – but their efforts to show empathy should be acknowledged and encouraged.
2) Embracing vulnerability
Traditionally, narcissists tend to portray an image of invincibility and perfection. But as they get older and less narcissistic, a surprising behavior they might adopt is embracing their vulnerability.
Being vulnerable means admitting to mistakes, showing genuine emotions, and expressing the need for others. This is a stark contrast to a narcissist’s usual behavior of always wanting to appear superior and infallible.
This shift can be quite profound. They start to open up about their weaknesses and fears, something they would have avoided in the past. And though it might seem like a sign of weakness to some, it actually indicates personal growth and emotional maturity.
Embracing vulnerability paves the way for deeper connections with others and a more authentic sense of self. It’s a significant step towards shedding narcissistic tendencies.
3) Active listening
One of the key behaviors that people who become less narcissistic as they age develop is active listening. Narcissists are usually more focused on expressing their own opinions and hardly ever thoroughly listen to what others have to say.
As they age and their narcissism wanes, they may start to genuinely listen to others. This goes beyond just hearing words – it involves understanding and responding thoughtfully to the speaker’s points.
According to research, active listening is not only a crucial communication skill, but it also contributes significantly to emotional intelligence. It validates the speaker’s feelings and shows respect for their perspective, which can foster healthier and more balanced relationships.
When a former narcissist begins to engage in active listening, it signifies a shift from self-centeredness to a more empathetic and considerate attitude. It’s one of the most tangible signs of their evolving personality.
4) Offering genuine compliments
In the past, a narcissist may have used compliments as a tool for manipulation, to get what they want, or to maintain control. But as they become less narcissistic with age, their approach to compliments can undergo a significant change.
They begin to offer genuine compliments that are heartfelt and specific. They start to see the good in others and express their appreciation without expecting anything in return.
For example, instead of giving vague praises just to flatter someone, they might acknowledge the effort a person has put into a project, or appreciate someone’s kindness or patience. This shift in behavior displays their growing capacity for sincerity and warmth.
When you notice this change, it’s an indication of their progress in moving away from narcissistic tendencies. It shows their ability to see beyond themselves and value others for their unique qualities.
5) Accepting criticism
In our lives, we all face criticism. It’s a part of growth and learning. But for a narcissist, criticism can feel like a direct attack on their self-image, often leading to defensive reactions or outright denial.
But as they get older and less narcissistic, they start to handle criticism more constructively. Instead of getting defensive or lashing out, they begin to accept it, reflect on it, and even use it as an opportunity for self-improvement.
This change can be challenging and might not come naturally at first. But over time, they learn to see criticism not as a threat, but as valuable feedback that can help them grow. This shift not only reduces their narcissistic tendencies but also makes them more approachable and easier to communicate with.
6) Becoming more grateful
Gratitude isn’t typically a trait you’d associate with a narcissist. They’re often more focused on what they don’t have or what they believe they’re entitled to.
However, as they age and become less narcissistic, you might notice an increased sense of gratitude in their behavior. They start to appreciate the small things in life and express thankfulness for what they have.
I recall a friend who used to have strong narcissistic tendencies. Over time, he started to change, and one day, he surprised us all by expressing appreciation for the beautiful sunset we were watching together. Instead of focusing on himself, he was savoring the moment and sharing his genuine gratitude for it.
This shift towards gratitude is a positive sign of reduced narcissism. It signifies a move away from self-centeredness towards acknowledging and appreciating the beauty and kindness around them.
7) Taking responsibility
Let’s be real here, narcissists are notorious for avoiding responsibility, especially when things go wrong. They’re quick to point fingers and place blame on others.
But as they age and their narcissistic tendencies decrease, they start to take ownership of their actions. They begin to recognize that they’re not always the victim and that their actions have consequences.
They might start to apologize when they’re wrong or admit when they’ve made a mistake. This behavior is a far cry from the blame-shifting they used to indulge in.
Taking responsibility is a hard pill to swallow for anyone, let alone for a former narcissist. But doing so is a significant step towards becoming less narcissistic. It shows maturity and a willingness to change, traits that are commendable in any individual.
8) Practicing self-awareness
At the heart of lessening narcissistic tendencies is the practice of self-awareness. This means recognizing one’s feelings, motives, and behaviors.
As they age, a person with narcissistic tendencies might start reflecting on their actions and understanding their impact on others. They may start questioning their motivations and considering how their words and actions make others feel.
This self-awareness is fundamental for personal growth and change. It’s the stepping-stone to all other behaviors mentioned in this article. Without it, none of these changes are likely to occur.
Remember, the journey from being highly narcissistic to less narcissistic is not a quick or easy one. But with patience, understanding, and self-awareness, it’s a journey that can lead to significant personal growth and improved relationships.
Conclusion
Understanding the changes that occur in someone as they move away from narcissistic tendencies can be an enlightening journey. It’s a testament to the human capacity for growth and change, no matter how entrenched our previous behaviors might have been.
This article has shed light on the key behaviors that people often adopt as they become less narcissistic. But remember, everyone’s journey is unique and unfolds at their own pace.
Progress might not always be linear, but every step toward empathy, understanding, and self-awareness is a victory in itself.
And while it’s important to recognize these transformations in others, it’s equally meaningful to apply these insights to our own lives. After all, we all have room for growth and improvement.
Here’s to fostering deeper connections, understanding others better, and becoming the best versions of ourselves. Cheers to growth, change, and a more empathetic world!
